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A Little Bit of Sanity and A Lot of Chaos: How to get rid of your husband's ugly chair.

Monday, November 15, 2010

How to get rid of your husband's ugly chair.

I bought this recliner at a garage sale for my husband on the day that we moved in to our very first house.

Sidenote: the house was in a sketchy area but the neighborhood was one that was turning....uhh....never did turn. We got out just in time.

But, this very ugly plether recliner has survived through 2 dogs, 3 houses and 3 children.

But, it was time to say good bye. It had to go. For the love of all that is holy, this chair needed to leave my house. Pronto.

I prepared him.

Me: Honey, maybe we should think about replacing the recliner with something a little more scaled down in size. It doesn't really fit in our house. It's just so big.
Stubborn: No.

This went on for a few months. That's what I do. I just break him down until he just can't take it anymore and he gives in. Eventually he loves everything that he has given in to. For example, kitchen cabinets, white trim, wood stairs, laminate floors, painted walls, barn wood table....the list goes on.

Tear him down, then build him back up. It's like the marine corp around here.

Fast forward a few months later (This past Friday).

Me: (Calling him at work, no less.) It's time to say goodbye to the brown chair. I'm taking the brown chair to Goodwill.
Him: I can't talk about this right now. (He had to pee.)

Him: (Calling me back.) You may only take it to Goodwill if I have complete control over the replacement.
Me: You can pick it as long as it is something that I approve.
Him: Well then I'm not really picking it am I?
Me: No, no you're not.
Him: Well then you may not get rid of my chair.
Me: (Silence)


I took this broke down, beat up, heavy, clunk of crap and loaded it in the van by myself. Hauled it to Goodwill and they said, "We can't take this. It's in too bad of shape." Huh. Yes, those are the exact words he used. I was angry. I huffed off with my bungie cord-strapped tail gate and went to the next place. My least favorite thrift store to purchase things. They took it no problem and will probably sell it for more than I paid for it over 8 years ago.

So there.

It was the first thing he noticed when he got home. But didn't mention it until later that evening.....he wasn't THAT upset. He really wants a new chair!


Goodbye ugly brown plether recliner. Off to the land of frat boys and bachelor pads with you. Enjoy your new life. Farewell. Godspeed.


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Blogger Lori said...

Good riddance! Good job, I didn't know GW would turn stuff down! I would have had to laugh at that one.

November 15, 2010 at 6:28 AM  
Blogger Get Your Martha On said...

Goodwill turned it down???! Too funny.

Happy chair hunting!

November 15, 2010 at 7:01 AM  
Blogger Annie Wilcox Designs said...

Goodbye to the well worn well loved chair. Hysterical story about Goodwill.

November 15, 2010 at 7:36 AM  
Blogger CW said...

I went through this as well. My DH's chair sat in the middle of the living room, NO I am not kidding- not against a wall .. in the middle of the room!

November 15, 2010 at 9:45 AM  
Blogger Anita @ GoingALittleCoastal said...

I need to replace his chair too. It's not a recliner but it's bulky. Here's the thing. He now wants a recliner. BUT I only agree to a recliner if it doesn't look like a recliner. I am on the hunt. Let me know if you see anything.

Oh and the line about I can't talk now, I have to pee, cracked me up. I get the same line. I think its a stall tactic so they can think it through for a come back.

November 15, 2010 at 10:26 AM  
Blogger Kolein said...

oh my gosh, you're living my life right at this very moment!!!!!

I got one too. It's tweed. Good lord. It's tweed. From the 80's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Really, it says it on a tag underneath!!!!!!!!!

I'm ok.

EC told me to get a new chair. Finally. He won't sit it any more though. I've noticed this. He sits everywhere else in the house. He's playing his guitar right now on the toilet in our bathroom (the acoustics, you know?)

I think he's trying to "let go", you know?


We have a GW that won't take stuff either. I said, "you're kidding, right?" NO MAM! (mam, I don't think so!)

OK, I have my own blog. Sorry.

Can't wait to see what fills the void where the pleather once was in your house!


November 15, 2010 at 7:36 PM  
Blogger Kolein said...

Did I mention that I was holding my stomach because I was laughing myself silly while reading your post?

I meant to!!!!


November 15, 2010 at 7:37 PM  
Blogger Sara @ Russet Street Reno said...

Men are so funny. I'm so happy you got rid of that heap!

November 15, 2010 at 9:04 PM  
Blogger Tres French Hens said...

This sounds exactly like the conversations I have with my husband! I always win and he always is gracious enough to admit I was right. Truly a match made in heaven!

November 16, 2010 at 2:38 PM  
Blogger Hartwood Roses said...

What is it about husbands and their precious chairs?? It seems to have been this way from the beginning of time (paging Archie Bunker.) My theory is that this an innate need, fueled by some Y-chromosome, sex-linked gene. We of the X-chromosome persuasion just can't understand ... and we don't have to! If the chair is ugly and broken down, the chair must leave.

Not surprised about the Goodwill portion of your story. So many folks bring SOOO much stuff to Goodwill, they turn things down all the time. You're fortunate that they didn't take your chair, then pitch it into the dumpster as soon as you left (it happens!)

November 17, 2010 at 6:37 AM  

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