This post brought to you by The Safety Patrol

Rule number 1. Always wear gloves while staining or your fingernails and the tiny creases and crevices in your hands (You all have those right? Not just me?) will look like vampire nails.

Rule number 2. Always wear your respirator while spray painting. I mean really, how attractive is this:

(Just keepin' it real.)

That's it. Safety patrol duties are done. Just wait until I show you what I did while wearing this today...well yesterday or the day before, whenever you are reading this drivel.